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jenettIt is time for my (roughly) twice yearly weeding of my friends list. I weed my list the same reason I weed a library: just because something was a great choice at one time doesn't mean it continues to be static.
(I have just done this, so if you are still on my friends list, you don't need to comment or anything: you may just be intrigued by my background theory or something.)
And right now, in particular, I'm looking at some shifts in how I handle online time, and some limits on my ability to track events, people, etc. in people's lives. I want to be a good listener/reader, and I can't do that when I can't remember who the people involved are. I want to have more conversations and fewer monologues and there are limited number of those I can have in a day.
Some interactions have deep roots:
- We go back a long time (I am unlikely to ever drop one of my college friends off my reading list, for example.)
- I want to read someone's thoughts reliably and often on subjects of particular mutual interest (most commonly religion, group dynamics, or process geeking)
- And some people post infrequently, but I want to be able to include them in tightly filtered processing posts of my own. (again, usually about religious or group dynamics issues.)
But on the other hand, some interactions are fleeting (a swap, a particular topic, a shared interest that I'm spending less time with.)
Normally, I have three criteria:
- do I want to read this person's posts regularly (i.e. any time I refresh my list?)
- do I want them to be able to read my protected stuff?
- have we had a direct conversation online about anything in the last year?
This time, though, because of reworking how I spend some of my online time, I'm being more rigid with the last one. If we've had a few (pleasant!) interactions in the last year, but they're about topics I don't expect to post much about, or about things that will be in public over at Dreamwidth, I'm removing folks. I'm shifting much of my reading focus to people who semi-regularly post things that help me dig deeper. (This doesn't mean every post, but .. every week or three.)
I prefer this option to using reading filters: I find that in practice I rarely check the non-defaults, and it means that anyone who I have friended can feel reasonably assured that I am at least skimming everything they post. (Barring major illness, trips, etc. where I have less access.)
If you really want to continue to read stuff that isn't likely to be public posts over at Dreamwidth, please let me know and I'll consider (please let me know which types of posts, as I'll be working on revamping filters in the near future.) Most general stuff will be public over there: I'm only locking stuff that directly impacts other people, or that I'm still processing. Yes, this means that the same post may be locked here and public there.)
And if you've had me friended, but I hadn't friended you back, and you'd like to read my stuff, please let me know a bit more about you, and what you're interested in.
Comments are screened, so post whatever of the above makes sense to you (and let me know if it's a general comment and can be unscreened.)
(I have just done this, so if you are still on my friends list, you don't need to comment or anything: you may just be intrigued by my background theory or something.)
And right now, in particular, I'm looking at some shifts in how I handle online time, and some limits on my ability to track events, people, etc. in people's lives. I want to be a good listener/reader, and I can't do that when I can't remember who the people involved are. I want to have more conversations and fewer monologues and there are limited number of those I can have in a day.
Some interactions have deep roots:
- We go back a long time (I am unlikely to ever drop one of my college friends off my reading list, for example.)
- I want to read someone's thoughts reliably and often on subjects of particular mutual interest (most commonly religion, group dynamics, or process geeking)
- And some people post infrequently, but I want to be able to include them in tightly filtered processing posts of my own. (again, usually about religious or group dynamics issues.)
But on the other hand, some interactions are fleeting (a swap, a particular topic, a shared interest that I'm spending less time with.)
Normally, I have three criteria:
- do I want to read this person's posts regularly (i.e. any time I refresh my list?)
- do I want them to be able to read my protected stuff?
- have we had a direct conversation online about anything in the last year?
This time, though, because of reworking how I spend some of my online time, I'm being more rigid with the last one. If we've had a few (pleasant!) interactions in the last year, but they're about topics I don't expect to post much about, or about things that will be in public over at Dreamwidth, I'm removing folks. I'm shifting much of my reading focus to people who semi-regularly post things that help me dig deeper. (This doesn't mean every post, but .. every week or three.)
I prefer this option to using reading filters: I find that in practice I rarely check the non-defaults, and it means that anyone who I have friended can feel reasonably assured that I am at least skimming everything they post. (Barring major illness, trips, etc. where I have less access.)
If you really want to continue to read stuff that isn't likely to be public posts over at Dreamwidth, please let me know and I'll consider (please let me know which types of posts, as I'll be working on revamping filters in the near future.) Most general stuff will be public over there: I'm only locking stuff that directly impacts other people, or that I'm still processing. Yes, this means that the same post may be locked here and public there.)
And if you've had me friended, but I hadn't friended you back, and you'd like to read my stuff, please let me know a bit more about you, and what you're interested in.
Comments are screened, so post whatever of the above makes sense to you (and let me know if it's a general comment and can be unscreened.)
