jjhunter: Drawing of human JJ in ink tinted with blue watercolor; woman wearing glasses with arched eyebrows (JJ inked)
jjhunter ([personal profile] jjhunter) wrote in [personal profile] jenett 2013-07-26 03:28 pm (UTC)

Re: Growing the communities we yearn for

When you say,
Yes -- in looking for housemates for next year, I have been defaulting to "at least one of trans and crippy", because that means we're fairly likely to have common values/experience in areas that are really important to making shared housing safe for me (where I can't sensibly live alone, because I am much better at taking care of other people than of myself).
Do you mean at least person who is trans & at least one person significantly less physically abled? or are you hoping for at least one $housemate who shares both of those experiences with you? Other life experiences that might correlate with someone having similar values when it comes to:

physically safe & physically accessible housing/daily living:
  • growing up with parent or sibling with physical disability;
  • volunteer or professional work experience related to caretaking, physical therapy, or implementing/ensuring physical accessibility;
  • [insert further brainstorming here]

emotionally/socially safe + supportive housing/daily living:
  • volunteer or work experience with organizations you trust re: trans*-positive advocacy / support / institutional culture
  • [insert further brainstorming here]

More generally - if you had your druthers, how many housemates would you ideally live with? Beyond financial ability to pay rent & threshold shared values, what do you look for in a housemate? May be worth listing out things you value in people you have other types of relationships with, and then circling back to what you think makes for a good housemate. What kinds of people make for good work colleagues? What kinds of people make for good friends? etc.

(I'm beginning to suspect myself that a good housemate for me, at least, is somewhere between 'potential good friend' & 'potential good work colleague' territory, and I'd be interested to hear if that fits your experience / thinking at all. And of course, I haven't mentioned a thing about family, but attachment styles can be a factor in non-romantic relationships too, especially when you're in a smaller household (<4 people).)

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