Unfortunately, I'm finding that many of the things I think about as quality of life issues are things that I currently have a deficiency of.
First and foremost, I need confidence that all the bills and expenditures are going to be paid, with enough left over to save for emergencies and big projects. That is relative to the amount of money coming in - if I'm the only person in the household working, the anxiety is a lot greater unless the others in the household are really trying hard to stick to the budget. If they're also bringing in income, the panic can subside, assuming all the bills and things are still being met. I don't like being in debt, even the necessary kind that gives a break on taxes.
Beyond that, I also need some amount of space that is unequivocally mine. Significant Other discouraged this, strongly preferring that I think of everything as Ours, which is a result of zie's fear that I will engage in a giant Face Heel Turn and leave zie on the street with nothing. I still think of our shared residence as zie's that I am paying for when feeling particularly out of harmony.
Additionally, I need time away from my workday to claim as my own. This is difficult when animals have to be fed, chores done, and Significant Other laying claim to time because zie wants to feel connected through the fine art of watching television together. When out of harmony, this translates to "working five days to get paid and working two days without pay".
The account of time I want to myself is proportional to the amount of things that I want to do - busting heads in video games is a smaller time problem than, say, wanting to change operating systems. Not getting time is bearable, but being interrupted from the task is teeth-grinding.
Work quality involves getting the chance to flex the creative muscle once in a while, whether in getting a meaty reference question or in working on a project that will have impact. Having impact on people, and being able to get the feedback that the impact is good, is important.
Not that I'm demanding, or anything. I just want to feel like I'm helping and that nobody is thinking negatively of me.
no subject
First and foremost, I need confidence that all the bills and expenditures are going to be paid, with enough left over to save for emergencies and big projects. That is relative to the amount of money coming in - if I'm the only person in the household working, the anxiety is a lot greater unless the others in the household are really trying hard to stick to the budget. If they're also bringing in income, the panic can subside, assuming all the bills and things are still being met. I don't like being in debt, even the necessary kind that gives a break on taxes.
Beyond that, I also need some amount of space that is unequivocally mine. Significant Other discouraged this, strongly preferring that I think of everything as Ours, which is a result of zie's fear that I will engage in a giant Face Heel Turn and leave zie on the street with nothing. I still think of our shared residence as zie's that I am paying for when feeling particularly out of harmony.
Additionally, I need time away from my workday to claim as my own. This is difficult when animals have to be fed, chores done, and Significant Other laying claim to time because zie wants to feel connected through the fine art of watching television together. When out of harmony, this translates to "working five days to get paid and working two days without pay".
The account of time I want to myself is proportional to the amount of things that I want to do - busting heads in video games is a smaller time problem than, say, wanting to change operating systems. Not getting time is bearable, but being interrupted from the task is teeth-grinding.
Work quality involves getting the chance to flex the creative muscle once in a while, whether in getting a meaty reference question or in working on a project that will have impact. Having impact on people, and being able to get the feedback that the impact is good, is important.
Not that I'm demanding, or anything. I just want to feel like I'm helping and that nobody is thinking negatively of me.